Hi I’m Leonie and I’m pregnant.
Sounds exciting and I should be really happy, as happy as my husband is but this doesn’t seem to be the case with me. It’s not because I don’t want to be pregnant it’s because I’m petrified something might go wrong. I wonder how many pregnant women out there share the same experience….
A bit about me….
I’m 36, a secondary school teacher and live in London England. I got married last year in Italy…what an amazing day it was. Seems like a distant memory now….. I have two sisters, one niece and two wonderful and very supportive best friends. And let’s not forget a mother who calls me everyday since being pregnant to check how I’m doing and asks the same question. ‘How you feeling today?’
I was recently diagnosed with anxiety disorder I’ve known I’ve had it for sometime now but never did anything about. Actually, I think I’ve had it since the age of 8….. I remember something happening to me in primary school and how I reacted to it. I just didn’t know I had a condition.
Since February this year I started counselling once a fortnight where I am learning different ways to cope with my anxiety it’s very challenging and frustrating but I know the end results will be rewarding so I’m sticking with it. My counsellor has provided me with different tips and easy strategies to use to help manage my anxiety such as breathing techniques, meditation, counting to 10 slowly. These tools have really started to help me. However, since I find out I am pregnant my anxiety has gotten worse all the coping strategies I learnt in my counselling sessions have completely left my psyche. All I worry about are my babies. Oh! I forgot to say I’m pregnant with TWINS. Lucky me people say but I don’t feel lucky at all!!
I decided to write this blog about my pregnancy journey to share with pregnant women who have anxiety – a mental health condition that can take its toll on you especially during this time. However, anyone can read this it’s open to all. I’m sharing my real life experiences with you and I hope it helps women going through their pregnancy with anxiety feel just that little bit less worried distressed or afraid.
When researching information on twins and what to expect during pregnancy I didn’t really find what I was looking for. To be honest I didn’t really know what I was looking for but as a first time mum I wanted to read real life articles, stories, blogs about women who have had twins and how they coped during their pregnancy and women who were pregnant with a mental health condition. So far I know I’m having fraternal twins (dizygotic) non-identical which means I have two sacks in my stomach and each baby has its own umbilical cord and placenta therefore I could be expecting two boys, two girls or a boy and girl. I have twins in my family on my mothers side but was still shocked to hear this news. I always assumed if any of my mothers children had twins it would be one of my sisters. I’m not much of a maternal type, I do love kids and have plenty in my family but you give them back at the end of the day!
Follow on me on my journey of the trials and tribulations of suffering from anxiety and being pregnant with twins and how best to cope when feeling anxious.